


Scales

by wendymr



Series: Dragon AU [2]
Category: Lewis (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Magical Realism, Developing Relationship, Family, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Magical Realism, Trust
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-07
Updated: 2014-05-07
Packaged: 2018-01-23 22:58:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1582508
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wendymr/pseuds/wendymr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>James and Robbie grow closer.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Scales

A week later, they were slumped on the sofa watching QI, and James – as usual – was answering the questions faster than the contestants. Robbie was content with watching the bloke's expressions as the quiz progressed; for someone who claimed not to like popular TV, he always got worked up over QI.

As the final titles rolled, Robbie glanced James's way. "Quick coffee before you go?" It was getting late, and they were working tomorrow.

"Mmm. I'll make it, though." James sprang to his feet and headed to the kitchen.

Robbie got up to join him. "Thanks." _I like you making yourself at home in my flat._

James glanced around and smiled at him. "I'm glad." _I like it, too._

Robbie patted his shoulder. "Good." 

They chatted for a bit as they worked, and Robbie remembered something he'd intended to ask. "James?"

"Sir?" _Wish I could call you Robbie..._

"You can if you like," Robbie said. He didn't stand on ceremony much as far as being James's governor was concerned. True, he'd always called Morse 'sir', but Morse was the sort who'd whet his sharp tongue on you if you misspelled something, so he didn't think there would've been much leeway as far as formal terms of address. Robbie wasn't like that.

James flushed and looked as though he hadn't meant that to be overheard. "Sorry."

"Don't be. I should've told you you could long before this," Robbie said. "Anyway, me grandson's first birthday is coming up, and there's going to be a proper do at Lyn's. Was wondering if you might like to come?"

James gave Robbie a startled look. "I'm… wouldn't it be… just for your immediate family?"

"No," Robbie said. _If I didn't want you there, I wouldn't have asked you, lad._

James grimaced and nodded. "No, yes, of course. Sorry." He paused. "If you'd really like me to come… Robbie..."

_I really would._ "Good," Robbie said briskly. "That's settled, then."

"Thank you." James was pouring water into the mugs, and Robbie was pretty certain that he was hiding his face from Robbie – as well as shielding his true thoughts.

"You're welcome – an' thank you for agreeing to come. We'd like to have you with us." _You're as good as family to me – don't you know that by now?_

James almost dropped the milk. "I... really?"

"Course." _Think I like this true speech thing. Makes it easier to let you know stuff I don't find easy to say._

"Yes." _But what if the things I find difficult to say are... the wrong things to let you find out?_

Robbie rested a hand on James's upper back… gentle, and easy to pull away from if James didn't welcome the touch. "Won't happen." _I can't think of a single thing you could say, James, that would be 'wrong' far as I'm concerned._

"Oh," James said. _I want to believe that._

But he couldn't. Not yet. That was all right. It took time to break the ingrained habits of a lifetime; it had taken time for James to realise Robbie really didn't have any objection to his dragon heritage, and if it took time for James to realise Robbie was all right with… whatever James was worried about this time… well, he'd realise it eventually.

"You'll see," Robbie said gently, patting James's back, as he hadn't pulled away from the touch. _And anyone who's family to me is family to my family too._

James ducked his head, but it seemed that this time, he did it to hide a smile.

"Thank you, Robbie," James said a little later as he was leaving. _You don't know what this has meant to me._

Robbie patted his back again. "Don't if you don't tell me, eh?" _Wish you weren't afraid to tell me things._

James took a deep breath. "I'll try. It's... I'm just so used to having to keep secrets."

Right. Bit hard to change the habits of a lifetime. "You don't have to with me – but you don't have to tell me stuff if you don't want to either." _I know it takes time to trust._

"Thanks," James said again, and this time pressed his hand to Robbie's shoulder and, it seemed, deliberately met Robbie's gaze. _You're more important to me than anyone I've ever known._

With that, he ducked outside and closed the door.

_Didn't give me a chance to respond, lad_ , Robbie thought, but maybe that was the point. James had already said he was worried about saying the wrong thing, which meant what he was really worried about was provoking a negative response from Robbie. Saying the wrong thing wouldn't matter unless the person you were with didn't like it.

More important to James than anyone James had ever known. And James wasn't a bloke for qualifiers. So it wasn't 'more important to me than anyone I've ever known except my mum or dad or dog or best friend'. It was exactly what he'd said. And that was no small admission in the world of James Hathaway. It was a show of trust on par with admitting he was part dragon.

Robbie touched the door James had gone through, as if he could reach through it and touch James. _You're important to me too, James. Wish you'd let me tell you so._

* * *

The weekend of the birthday celebration came, and Robbie picked James up from his flat to drive him there.

James gestured to his clothes – jeans and a checked shirt. "Is this too casual?"

"It's fine," Robbie said.

"Because I can go in and change if it's not formal enough." _I want them to like me._

"James, look at me. I haven't got anything special on," Robbie said. _They'll like you no matter what kit you've got on._

He seemed to relax on the journey, and once they were on the motorway they took up again a discussion from the day before, about a case they were close to closing. "Just, for the love of my sanity, don't do that again. Not in Innocent's office!" Robbie almost pleaded.

James grinned. Innocent had – once again – cautioned them to be diplomatic in their dealings with certain important individuals. Outwardly, James had murmured his most respectful "Yes, ma'am." His true speech had almost got Robbie into serious trouble. _The sad fact is, ma'am, that most of the time your 'important people' turn out to be the ones we have to arrest._

"Don't suppose you'd believe me if I said I forgot you could hear me?"

"Too bloody right I wouldn't!" All the same, Robbie couldn't help but smile. _Me days'd be a lot more boring without you, man._

He expected James to make a joke of his admission, but instead the lad just spoke neutrally. "I'm glad to hear it."

_I don't know what I'm going to do when you retire._

Robbie twisted quickly, giving James a questioning glance, but he couldn't take his eyes away from the road long enough to learn anything useful. "How do you mean?"

He could hear James's shrug in his voice as well as see it out of the corner of his eye. "Plans. I have none." _You know the worst about me and you still care. You still want me as part of your life… even part of your family. Do you think there's anyone else in that nick who would feel the same way about me? Because I don't._

It was such an outpouring that Robbie needed a moment to think it all through. "You think someone else would treat you badly?"

"I think it's a distinct possibility. If that person found out what I was. Which, by the way, I have absolutely no interest in anyone besides you discovering." 

Robbie nodded slightly. "Although you did manage to keep it from me for years."

"Yes, but that's…" _But it's been different knowing you knew. Knowing I didn't have to hide it…that I could mention something about it to you in passing and knowing not just that you'd tolerate it, but that you'd welcome it._

"James..." _What if I... I dunno, if I found someone at the nick who was more... open–minded? Or if you did something different, where you don't need to work so closely with someone else? Maybe research, or community–_

"No. I don't..." _It's not just work. It's... you'll retire, and you'll move, and I won't... I'll be alone._

Robbie's heart faltered for a split second. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed the sign for Warwick services, and wondered if he should stop. Maybe this was better discussed over a cuppa and – in James's case – a cigarette. "Do you want... should we stop?" 

"No." James pulled a face. "You shouldn't be late getting to Lyn's." _And I'm sorry I said that. It's not your problem. You're not responsible for me._

Was this one of the things James had been afraid to say in case it was the 'wrong' thing? That he believed Robbie was going to leave Oxford once he retired, and leave James behind?

"I can call Lyn and tell her I'll be late. We could stop and…"

James shook his head. "It's not… the way we talk now, sir, we can't have a conversation about something like this in public. What you say in response to me won't make any sense to anyone who overhears, and that could raise suspicions." _I'm sorry. I'd like to stop and chat but I don't see how we can._

"Suppose you're right," Robbie said with some resignation. Their conversations probably didn't make much sense at the nick either, but at least there they were mostly discussing work. Discussing something private like this… James was right. It would be safer done in the car.

They drove in silence for a short while as Robbie tried to work out what to say. "James…" _If you think I would leave you alone, even once I'd retired, you're wrong. Asked you to come with me this time, didn't I? I'm trying to pull you closer, not push you away._

"But it won't be convenient," James began.

"Being close to someone doesn't have to be convenient," Robbie interrupted. _And I hate the thought of you alone like that. Hurts to think of you that lonely._

"But I said you're not respons–"

Struggling not to sound impatient – hadn't he made himself perfectly clear? – Robbie interrupted. "It's got nothing to do with feeling responsible for you, man. You're me best mate. Course I don't want to see you alone an' unhappy." _And don't you think I'd miss you, too? Why would I want to go anywhere when you're here?_

"Really?"

"Really. So maybe you'd better start thinking of ways to occupy me when I retire, 'cause you'll find you're going to be spending almost as much time with me as before." _Besides, you turned me part–dragon – isn't there some sort of dragon lore that says I belong to you now?_

James had that strange little smile on his face that meant he was feeling reasonably happy but was trying not to show it as much as he felt it. _I want to spend time with you. That's all I want._

But before Robbie could answer that, James plunged ahead verbally. "Actually, bonding is something that's shrouded in deep mystery. There are records of true speech and other things occurring from bonding between…" James couldn't restrain his smile. "…between members of our kind. But it's not clear how much of that is legend and how much of it is true. If you're thinking of a vampire sort of thing, no, I don't have some sort of claim on you now."

"Don't be ridiculous," Robbie grumbled. "Even I know the difference between a bunch of made-up rubbish about a group of made-up beings and stuff about dragons."

James was still smiling though, and it only took a moment for Robbie to figure out why. He'd said 'our kind'. Early on, when he'd told Robbie about his history, he'd referred to people with dragon blood as 'my kind', isolating himself. But now it was 'our kind', not alone any more… a group. Honestly, the thought made Robbie want to smile as well.

"Go on, then," Robbie said with a nod. "What's your favourite story about dragon bonding?"

James ducked his head. "I don't know." _That you can only bond with someone who really matters to you. And from then on, you'll be complete._

Complete. Was that how James felt now? Now that he and Robbie had this rare true–speech between them? And why he was suddenly so concerned about Robbie leaving?

But no. That didn't feel right. The relationship he had with James, this deep friendship... well, more than that, really. This sense that James was as close to him as family – well, it wasn't new, was it? They'd had that for at least the last two or three years, as they'd grown closer. James healing him and turning him part–dragon had nothing to do with that. What was different, now, was that James seemed more willing to tell him how he felt about things – though even that wasn't a sudden development. 

"From then on?" he questioned. _Seems to me as if we already were... bonded, weren't we? Didn't take a bit of dragon–scale to make that happen._

James turned to look at him again. "You think so?"

"Obvious, isn't it?" _The only other person I've felt this close to in me life was Val._

"Yeah?" James whispered, and Robbie didn't have to be looking at James to feel that the lad was staring at him. With what expression, though, Robbie couldn't tell.

Robbie nodded, eyes on the road. "Wouldn't lie to you."

"That's…" James trailed off, but only aloud. _That's what I want. That kind of closeness. With you._ And even the words by themselves didn't express the feeling, the yearning that James put into them. He wouldn't quite like it and he didn't just want it. It was an ache somewhere inside him that Robbie could almost feel himself.

"You've got it," Robbie said quietly. _And I hope you know we Lewis men don't give that to just anyone._

He didn't, that was true. But he mentally backed up for a moment. 'That kind of closeness'... what had he just offered James? Love? Romance? The precise kind of relationship he'd had with Val? Was that what James had meant, or something more nebulous?

Though did it really matter? He'd already acknowledged that he felt a... bond between them, for lack of a better word. And it wasn't just as a result of what James had done. If that had deepened what was between them at all, then it'd only been slight. He'd already – yes, he'd already loved James by then.

But the rest? It was odd; the idea wasn't anything like as off–putting as he would have imagined it should be.

"Thank you," James whispered. "I never imagined..." _I hope I didn't... back you into a corner, make you feel you had to say that._

Robbie took one hand off the wheel and reached across to cover James's with it. "You ever known me to do something because I felt I had to?" _Wait till I'm not driving, pet, an' we'll see how well you can back me into a corner._

He heard James breathe out, a long, slow exhale… probably in response to Robbie's true speech. "No. I haven't." _It would be my pleasure, Robbie._ And apparently it would be, because James's words were almost vibrating with joy. 

Robbie risked a glance at James, and there was a brightness in his eyes, a gladness Robbie had never seen there before. For Robbie. Because of Robbie. And Robbie felt pleased and… yes, almost proud that he could help James feel that way.

James squeezed Robbie's hand and then let go. "I should let you drive. Wouldn't want to distract you." _At the moment._

Robbie smiled. "We're nearly there." _I'll be fair game soon enough._

"Not that nearly," James points out. And he's right; they're barely north of Birmingham. _Maybe I would like a coffee. Or a cigarette. Don't you need petrol? Or a pee? Services in five miles, if I'm not wrong._

"Never are, are you?" Robbie grinned at him. _All right. Only 'cause it's you._

* * *

He felt his heart beating more rapidly as the countdown signs to Hilton Park services flashed by. In the car park, he deliberately found a space behind a couple of tour–buses, away from most of the other cars. It wasn't that he was ashamed of anything he and James might be about to do, but he didn't want an audience.

He turned off the engine and turned to face his awkward sod, his shiny dragon. _Now._

James almost seemed to have stopped breathing. He leaned forward, then hesitated and brought a hand up to caress Robbie's face, so gently, so tenderly that Robbie almost forgot how to breathe himself. And then James leaned in further, until their lips were touching. And, **Christ** , it was good. Bloody amazing, in fact. 

Robbie brought his hand around the back of James's head, holding his dragon–man steady so that he could deepen the kiss. James's lips parted and their tongues touched and, if Robbie hadn't known better, he'd have said sparks flew. _Christ, pet, if it's like this from just a kiss, I can't wait to find out what we're like in bed._

James froze, and his hand fell away from Robbie's face. Robbie drew back, staring at him, concerned. "What is it? What did I say?"

"I... I don't know if I..." _I've never..._

Robbie was more surprised than anything. It had… well… it had never occurred to him James might not have… "No?"

James shook his head, hunching forward and hugging himself a bit. "I was training to be a priest. They frown on that sort of thing. And then…" _Once the scales came. I couldn't show anyone. No one could see. No one could know. And if that meant… that I'd have to… abstain…_ His face was scarlet and his true speech was tinged with panic.

Maybe he had them all over, Robbie thought, wondering why it had never occurred to him. Maybe he didn't just have scales on his arms… maybe they were on his stomach and legs and back as well. Maybe not, but… James always kept those areas covered too, so there was no way to be sure. He didn't think he'd ever seen the lad in shorts, and he knew he'd never seen him shirtless. Any partner would… would have to see.

"It's all right, pet," Robbie said softly, resting a hand on James's shoulder. "We can go as slow as you like and we don't have to do anything you don't want. Ever." _And if you decide you do want to, just tell me what to do to help you, and I will. Promise._

James rested a hand on Robbie's arm, seeming to be at least partially reassured. "Thank you." _It… it isn't that I don't want to… I think I would… like to… at some point... it's… just… James blushed and looked away. I don't want to be bad at it._

Oh, you," Robbie said fondly, reaching for James's hand again. "Always have to be a perfectionist at everything, don't you? Spare a thought for us poor ordinary mortals some time, eh?"

James's eyes widened, and then after a moment he smirked. "I know, I know, you keep reminding me that I should learn not to be perfect at everything." _I just don't want it to be this... **us**... that I fail at._

"Not failing so far, far as I'm concerned. I'd give that kiss a ten out of ten." _And if all we do is kiss for the next year or more, I'll still be happier than I've been in years_. He thought for a moment. I know you're... self–conscious about your scales, and you don't like to be touched. It really is okay if you never want to get any more... intimate than this.

Serious again now, James met his gaze. "I do. But... slowly would be good."

"Okay, then." Robbie squeezed his hand, then released it. "Now, think I really do need that pee. And I expect you want a ciggie and a coffee."

James laughed. "I should've known you weren't making that up. And yes to both. Do you want any coffee?" 

"Could do with one," Robbie said with a nod. "None of that fancy whipped cream triple–decker posh-named stuff though. Just a proper coffee."

"Right," James said. "Proper coffee with an elaborate chocolate sculpture on top."

Robbie gave James a look, and James smiled innocently at him.

"Do what you like," Robbie said with a chuckle. "I'm off."

When Robbie returned to find James waiting outside, James flicked away the remnants of his cigarette and offered Robbie the coffee he'd bought for him. Robbie waited till they were in the car to have a sip. "You bought some sort of fancy roast, didn't you?"

"I know you said nothing posh, but this really does taste better than the stuff you usually get, doesn't it?" James asked.

Robbie took another sip and admitted grudgingly, "Yeah, it does."

They were just passing Stafford when James glanced at Robbie with a frown. "I just thought... what about Lyn?"

"What about her?"

"What are you going to tell her?" _That I've not only made you part–dragon, but we're also... together. What's she going to think?_

He shook his head in fond amusement. "Oh, yeah, Lyn's going to have a real problem with the fact that you saved my life. Haven't told her about the scales yet, but only because I didn't want to give away your secret, no other reason. As for the rest... she's been wanting me to find someone for the last couple of years. Got a bee in her bonnet about me not bein' alone for the rest of me life."

"I can understand **that** , but... me?"

Robbie frowned. "Don't think I understand what you're asking, lad. First, why are you so keen to imagine she'd object, and second, why would you think that would have any bearing?"

James shook his head. "It always makes a difference. People say, 'Oh, it won't matter what this person thinks’, but it does matter, because it changes how those people relate to each other. If your daughter disapproved of me, and that put strain on your relationship with her, I'd feel terrible."

"Even if that did happen, and I don't think it will, it wouldn't be your fault," Robbie said. "She's not in this relationship. You and I are." _And I don't see why you keep harping on the idea that Lyn isn't going to like you._

"She hasn't met me before," James said quietly, "and I tend not to make good first impressions. People tend to think I'm… somewhat aloof." 

Robbie thought a moment. Then he said, "'Believe me, every heart has its secret sorrows, which the world knows not, and oftentimes we call a man cold, when he is only sad.'"

James looked at him. "Longfellow."

Robbie nodded. "Yeah." _I hate to see you tear yourself down this way. It's obvious to me how special you are… how good a bloke you are. Wish you could see it._

James quirked an eyebrow. "You're biased."

"Oh, yeah? An' was I biased last month when I had to give you a bollocking over what you said to that professor? Was I biased when I stood there an' applauded with everyone else when Innocent gave you that commendation? And that's only work. When I got knifed in the arm six months ago, you practically moved into me flat to make sure I could cope. Biased? I don't think so." _And if I thought you really believed that, I'd shake you!_

"Shaking not necessary, thanks," James pointed out. "But, much as I appreciate the Longfellow, the fact remains that Lyn is very important to you, and she may not at all like the idea of me as your... partner."

"What I said still stands. Besides, she may not have met you, but she already likes you. You think I don't talk to her about you as much as I do to you about her? Think she doesn't know everything you've done for me over the years?" _She even told me a couple of years ago that she worried a lot less about me knowing I had you._

James smiled at that, but said, "She might change her mind the first time she sees us kissing."

"I don't see why," Robbie said, frowning.

Again, he could feel James looking at him. "Don't you?"

Robbie sighed. "If it's the dragon bit, I've already told you, that doesn't matter to us. Her son is visibly part-dragon."

"Yes," James said steadily. "But her father didn't used to be."

Robbie glanced at James in amazement. "You think that's going to matter to her?"

"It matters to most people," James said. _Yes, I think it's going to matter to her._

"My daughter's not that small–minded," Robbie said. How could James think she was even after everything he'd told him about her and about their family?

"It's not a question of that," James said quietly. "It's a question of preferring members of your family not to be perceived as something less than other people. Anyone would have that reaction. Not just someone small–minded."

Robbie would have been angry with James for assuming his Lyn was that prejudiced. He hadn't even met her, after all, and here he was making assumptions.

But not only had he not met her – and so couldn't possibly know what she was like; he was also **James** , conditioned to expect the worst in most situations, and to believe that he was somehow less deserving than other people. So if there was something he badly wanted – like Robbie – then of course he was going to convince himself that something was going to stop him having it.

"Do something for me, eh?" Robbie said instead.

"What?" _Anything. You know I will._

"Wait and meet Lyn before you convince yourself that she'll hate us being together, all right?" _Just take the time to get to know her and let her get to know you. And I promise you: whatever happens, whatever she thinks, I won't go back on what I've said to you._

James ducked his head. "You're right. I'm sorry." _It's one of the things I'm most afraid of. That I have you now, only to have you taken away from me._

Robbie didn't know what to say. What could he say? It was a fear he understood all too well, a fear he'd had realised once before. "Yeah." _I understand. I… I understand._

He could sense the exact moment James realised what he'd said. "Oh…" James touched his arm gently, briefly. "Robbie, I'm sorry…"

"Stop saying that. You've got nothing to apologise for," Robbie said. _We all worry about that sometimes… with the people we care for most of all. Be grateful you don't have kids._

James nodded. "I am."

The closer they got to Lyn's, the more danger there was that James would turn himself into a nervous wreck. By the time Robbie reached the end of the M56, the lad had gone completely silent and was chewing his nails.

"If my Lyn knew you were this scared of meeting her, she'd laugh her head off," he commented as he turned into the narrow suburban street containing Lyn's Victorian terraced house. _She'd never believe anyone could find her scary. Even her patients think she's a complete softy._

"Maybe I need to get sick, then," James quipped, though Robbie could feel the nervousness that still lay beneath.

He parked outside Lyn's, then immediately leaned over to James and kissed him again. It took a moment or two before his dragon–lad relaxed enough to kiss him back, but it seemed to help. James smiled, took a deep breath and said, "Come on, let's not keep your grandson waiting any longer."

Lyn opened the door and immediately enveloped Robbie in a huge hug. That wasn't surprising. The surprising bit followed when she did the same to James. "It's so wonderful to meet you at last!" she exclaimed. "I've wanted to for years – almost as long as you've been working with Dad. You've been **so** good for him."

_I didn't expect this!_ "It's lovely to meet you too."

_Did tell you, pet._ "Come on, love, don't embarrass the man."

Lyn pulled back, blushing a bit. "Shouldn't have waited so long to bring James up here, should you?" She ushered them inside. "Do you want to take your things upstairs? I'll go and put the kettle on. Dad, I put you both in the spare room, okay?"

Ah. Both in the spare room. So… if Lyn didn't know what their relationship was, perhaps she had at least suspected. She might've suspected they were doing rather more than they were if she intended they should share a bed.

Robbie turned to look at James, who was looking rather shy. He wanted to ask if James was all right, but didn't want to embarrass the lad by drawing attention to his discomfort.

"I want to thank you," James said, drawing himself up a bit. "Lyn. For welcoming me into your home. I know it's… something of an imposition…"

"An imposition?" Lyn looked surprised. "No, it isn't. I've been so looking forward to meeting you." She leaned in and said confidentially, "I expect you to tell me all the stories about Dad he won't share."

James seemed to be surprised to be taken into confidence in such an automatic way. "If… if he doesn't mention things… I don't think…"

"James, I'm teasing," Lyn said gently. "I don't expect anything. I just want you to have a good time so you'll want to come back."

James looked surprised. "I…" _I can't imagine how you could know you want me to come back having just met me_. "…thank you."

Robbie tapped him lightly on the shoulder. "Come on, let's get our stuff upstairs." _Did say, didn't I? Not that I'm one to say I told you so._

"Of course." _Yes, I can see that. Halfway up the stairs, James mumbled something indistinct, but Robbie actually heard, _And... she put us in the same room? What did you tell her?__

"Nothing." _Come on, how could I? Only happened today!_

He pushed open the spare room door and all was explained. The double bed he'd slept in before was still there, but the dressing–table had been moved to the other side of the room and a folding bed had been placed under the window. "Ah. Probably thought you'd be more private here than downstairs." 

"And she didn't check to see if you'd mind?" 

Robbie shrugged. "Why would I? Even before today, I mean." _Don't mind at all now, course I don't. And... up to you, but you don't have to sleep in that thing, far as I'm concerned._

James hesitated, setting down his case and looking at the double bed. "I'm not… I…" 

"That's not meant to be pressure, James, in case I didn't make meself clear earlier," Robbie said. _Would never want you to do something I wanted and you didn't. That'd make me feel awful._

James nodded. "Thank you." _Can I… propose something?_

Robbie set down his own case at the foot of the bed, eyebrows lifting as he turned to James and waited for him to finish what he was going to say. 

"I'd like to…" James hesitated. _I'd like to try cuddling. Just that. With you. I want to… hold you and be held. But if I need to… if it's too much... I want to know that I can go back to my own bed without hurting you by it. I may not need to, but..._

"Of course," Robbie said gently. _Setting boundaries won't hurt me, pet. Not setting them and then me doing something you don't like or don't want… that would hurt me more, knowing I'd done that to you._

James looked relieved. "Thank you." 

"Oi." James raised an eyebrow. "Never be afraid to let me know what you want – or don't want. All right?" 

James took a deep breath. "I know. You're right. I suppose I'm... not used to something like this." _And just so scared of messing it up._

"You couldn't." Robbie rested a hand on James's shoulder. "How long've we been friends? How much have we depended on each other? This isn't new, not really. Just... more." _You were already one of the two or three most important people in my life, pet. Think I wouldn't do anything to keep you there? Including being patient while you sort out what you want? An' even that's not a problem, 'cause I have so much with you already._

James took a step closer to Robbie. "Then maybe you'd like it if I did this again." He dipped his head and leaned in, brushing his lips against Robbie's. _Can't believe I'm kissing you under your daughter's roof._ He took a deep breath, then kissed Robbie again, lingering this time. 

Robbie closed his eyes and returned the kiss, lifting a hand to cup James's cheek affectionately. He let James take the lead because, after what they'd just talked about, Robbie wanted James to know that, at least in the realm of physical affection, James could lead and he would gladly follow. This was a less frantic kiss than the one they'd shared in the car on the way, but it felt just as nice… just as strong a connection between the two of them, just in a different key. He ought to tell James that some time; as a musician, James would appreciate it. 

James ended the kiss. "Mmm." _I must admit, I do like that._

"Yeah, me too," Robbie murmured, caressing James's cheek with his fingertips. 

James sighed softly, leaning into the touch. "Good." 

Watching James respond to loving touch was like watching the petals of a flower open once you'd touched it. Robbie could've watched his face all day. 

An hour or so later, James and Lyn were getting on like a house on fire. Lyn had also caught Robbie's eye a few times and given him approving grins. After a while, Robbie'd used true speech to reassure James that Lyn liked him; he'd replied to let Robbie know that he liked her a lot as well. _Not that I should be at all surprised. How could your daughter not be as wonderful as you?_

James had been introduced to Matthew and was on the floor helping the little boy play with his favourite fire engine. And then, suddenly, Matthew rolled onto his front and crawled towards James, then rolled over again to grin up at his new best friend. The little boy's top had pulled up to reveal his scaly belly. 

For a moment, it seemed as if everyone in the room had frozen. Lyn was staring at James, a hesitant look on her face. James was staring at Matthew, and Robbie was just waiting, ready to intervene if he needed. 

And then James turned to Lyn and rolled up his sleeve. 

Lyn's gaze shifted to James's arm to his scales that were clear to see in the daylight and, for one more frozen moment, no one did anything. It felt as though everyone in the room except Matthew was holding his breath. James's body was tensed as if he were waiting for some sort of physical or emotional blow. 

"Oh," Lyn breathed, smiling in relief. "Oh, _good._ " 

James looked intensely startled. "Good?" 

Lyn nodded. "I knew it was more than likely Matthew's scales would show some time while you were here, and I didn't think you would react badly, but… mums do worry, you know." 

A series of emotions shifted rapidly across James's face. "Yes." I think I remember that. 

Lyn reached out, and for a moment, Robbie held his breath, wondering if Lyn was going to touch James's scales, and whether James would pull away… but of course she didn't. She touched his shoulder. "And now I don't have to worry. Thank you for trusting me enough to show me."

"You're welcome," James said, still sounding a bit stunned.

As Robbie watched, James brought his hand up to cover Lyn's. She sat still for a moment, then leaned in and pressed a gentle kiss to his cheek. Straightening again, she said, "James, could I ask you a huge favour?"

"Of course." _I never imagined... She's just accepted me – what I am._

_Course she did, pet. Told you, you're family to me, you're family to mine._

"You see," Lyn continued, "neither Tim nor I have any dragon in us. Matthew's a throwback – Mum's aunt, and she died years ago. And there's so much misinformation and prejudice around – well, you'll know that. We don't want Matthew growing up only hearing the horrible stuff and maybe even believing that he's... less than everyone else, just because of his genetic heritage. We've wished for a while that we knew someone who could help Matthew to understand that part of who he is, as he grows up, and allow him to be proud of it. If you'd be willing to do that... we'd both so appreciate it."

"M... me?" James was wide–eyed as he turned to stare at Robbie. _How can I encourage him to be proud... I'm hardly a role–model for dragons, you know that!_

Robbie coughed slightly. _None better. And maybe helping Matthew will help you, too._

James took a deep breath and turned back to Lyn; Robbie noticed that Lyn was giving the two of them deeply curious looks. "I'd be honoured to."

A lump in his throat, Robbie crossed the room to his daughter and his partner, then knelt down beside them and wrapped his arms around the two of them.

* * *

Later that night, Robbie and James were preparing for bed when James said, "I'll have to do some more research."

"How do you mean?" Robbie asked.

"If I'm going to be Matthew's… dragon mentor…" _Which I'm still not convinced is a good idea, but I've said I will, and I will._ "…I'm going to have to know more."

"I'm sure you know plenty for the purposes of talking to a little boy," Robbie said.

James sighed. "It would be easier if there weren't so much misinformation. You find it all the way back to Pliny, who was convinced dragon–men could make crops grow or die, depending on how they looked at them."

"Pity you can't. I could use you round the allotment," Robbie said, sitting on the edge of the double bed. _You up for a cuddle?_

James nodded, crossing to the bed. "How do you want to…?"

Robbie gestured him forward. "Climb in and we'll work out the details."

James did so, and they spent a few moments shifting position, moving into different positions and trying to work out which was best. They ended up facing each other, James shifting down in bed so he could rest his head on Robbie's chest. Each had his arms round the other.

"Seems odd, you being down there when you're taller than me," Robbie said. "Sure you're comfortable?"

"Yes." _I like to hear your heartbeat._

Robbie smiled warmly and kissed the top of James's head. "Goodnight, lad."

They slept soundly. Whatever James had been worried about with respect to cuddling, it didn't happen – Robbie woke once during the night and found that he still had his arms full of his half–dragon partner. James's head was tucked into the gap between Robbie's shoulder and neck. There was such trust in the lad's unconscious snuggling, Robbie thought, and this from a bloke who found it so hard to let himself be close to anyone – emotionally or physically.

* * *

In the morning, Robbie woke again to find James watching him, wonder and love in his expression. He smiled back, not moving, letting James set the boundaries this morning. Moments later, James moved closer and kissed him, deepening the kiss within seconds and shifting so that he could stroke his fingers through Robbie's hair. Robbie returned the gesture, enjoying the texture of James's fine, silky hair, and glad that it was a little longer at the moment.

"Mmm." _We don't have to get up yet, do we?_

"Not yet. Twenty minutes, maybe."

"Good." James kissed him again, then drew back to study Robbie's face. _Could I... would you mind...?_

"Dunno if I mind unless you tell me."

"I'd like to see... the scales I gave you."

Robbie smiled. "Course I don't mind that. In a way... they're part yours too, aren't they?"

James frowned slightly. "I would never presume..."

"No, no, I know that," Robbie said, brushing his fingers through James's hair again. _I think I like that about them though. Having a bit of you with me all the time._

James looked shy. "You don't think they're ugly?"

"They're not ugly," Robbie said softly, lifting his pyjama top. "Look."

Robbie's scales were smaller than James's, and there were more of them. If it hadn't been for their faint iridescence, which was only visible because of the sunlight coming through the window, they would have been almost invisible. They covered the left side of his upper abdomen, where he'd been wounded. 

"You're right," James whispered, sounding surprised by his own observation. "You're right... they..." _They're beautiful_. He looked at Robbie. "Can I touch them?"

Robbie nodded.

James was tentative at first, brushing his fingers over the scales gently, but then he pressed his hand flat against them... just to touch, just to feel. For his part, Robbie hadn't expected to feel anything, but James's touch there felt intimate in a way that didn't feel... wholly human. Robbie could feel the bond between them strengthening, as though it were a physical, tangible thing.

"Can you feel that?" Robbie whispered.

James nodded, expression a bit awed. "Yes."

"It's amazing," Robbie said. "Hope you can find out more about this bond stuff when you do your research, pet. I'd like to know what else might happen."

James nodded. "You don't mind?" Robbie could hear the anxiety in his voice.

"Mind? Feeling... connected to you, you mean? Why would I?"

James's expression was troubled. "Because it's to me, and not..." _Not your wife_.

Ah. Val. He really didn't mind, but he had to pause to consider why not. "Well, first of all, loving you doesn't mean I love Val any less. There's enough to go around, you know." He leaned towards James and kissed him, lingering. "Second... I'm not really sure I'd've wanted to have Val an' me be able to hear what we really meant, like you and I can." He took a deep breath, then lay flat on the bed again and tugged James down to lie across his chest. "There was a lot I didn't – couldn't – tell her. Mostly about the job, o'course. Never wanted her to know the sort of things I saw some days, even if regulations had allowed me to talk about it. An' true speech would've only meant her knowing the sort of stuff I wanted to protect her from."

It sounded a bit patronising when he put it like that – and Val would certainly have said it was. But he felt sure James would understand – any copper would. 

"And I'm on the job with you, so that's not an issue."

"Yeah." Robbie's arms tightened around James. "But the other reason I'm glad I didn't have this sort of bond with her is... What happens when a bond's broken?" _How much worse could it have been when I lost her?_ And what could happen if either he or James lost the other?

James rested his head against Robbie's shoulder, obviously using the touch to comfort himself at what was, admittedly, a very sad thought. "That's one of the areas… no one knows for sure. There's… quite a bit of grey."

"What, with broken bonds?" Robbie asked.

James nodded. "Some stories say a bonded pair can't die… that if one is injured badly enough, the healing energy will… flow from the other to save his life. Then there are stories that… that when one member of a bond dies, the other dies too."

"Don't think I like that," Robbie murmured.

"No," James agreed. "Some stories say that when one member of a bonded pair dies, his essence or soul or whatever you want to call it stays with the other one until he dies."

"Like a ghost?" Robbie asked.

"More like… a voice in the back of your mind. Except that voice really is that person," James said.

Robbie smiled slightly. "Wouldn't mind that. Having you in my head." _Used to imagine talking to Val sometimes, moments when I needed her_.

"Do you still?" James asked quietly.

"Not as often now," Robbie said. "She always knew how to talk to Mark better than me. Sometimes when I'm talking to him I wonder what she'd say." _But it's been too long. I've forgotten the way she used to talk._

James nodded. "I'm sorry." _I don't know what to say to comfort you. But I want to._

"Don't think there's anything to say," Robbie said quietly. _Just be here, pet. Believe me, that's comfort enough_.

After breakfast, James and Robbie were co–opted into preparations for the birthday party. Robbie was kept busy blowing up balloons, while Lyn took advantage of James's height to get him to pin the decorations on the walls and ceiling. Not only did James not seem to mind, but he clearly relished being treated as part of the family.

Tim was the cook of the household, so he was busy in the kitchen with food preparations – mainly for the adult guests, of course, since most of the children who'd be coming weren't even eating solid food yet. All in all, it was exactly the kind of happy, organised chaos that had characterised birthdays and other celebrations in the Lewis household years ago, and it brought back so many happy memories for Robbie. A few years ago, he'd have found this bittersweet at best, and he might even have found it hard to be here. Now, he was just happy to see Lyn carrying on family traditions.

Lyn seemed to remember, as well; she looked across at Robbie and smiled. "I remember Mum getting things organised for one of Mark's parties years ago and ordering us all around. D'you remember, Dad? That was the year you let me help blow up the balloons and I couldn't tie them properly."

"And half of them deflated ten minutes into the party." Robbie laughed aloud. "Not quietly, either."

"No." Lyn dissolved into giggles. Then she glanced at James. "You must have funny stories from growing up?"

James froze. Then, before Robbie could say anything, he put down the banner he'd been taping to the wall and quietly left the room.

"Dad? What did I–"

Robbie shook his head at Lyn and hurried out of the room, finding James in the hall. "C'mere, bonny lad. I'm sorry. She didn't know."

"No, I'm sorry." James came into his arms. "I shouldn't have spoilt your grandson's birthday." _It's not as if it even **matters**._ Not now.

"It matters," Robbie murmured, tucking James's head into his shoulder. His other hand stroked the lad's back. "Matters to me."

"Dad? James?" Bugger. Lyn'd followed them – and he could hear the shock in her voice.

James made a move as if to pull away, in panic, but Robbie held him firm. _I'm not ashamed of you. You stay just where you are._

James relaxed a bit, remaining cuddled against Robbie.

"Thought you might've guessed already, love," Robbie said, keeping his voice calm. "The way you put us in the same room."

Lyn looked bewildered, as though she didn't know what to say first. "When did you…?"

"It's been coming a long time," Robbie said, voice still calm and even, "but this bit's new."

When Lyn spoke again, she sounded hurt. "Were you ever going to tell me?"

"I was," Robbie said. "I just didn't know what would be a good time. Thought the moment might present itself, like James showing his scales."

James lifted his head to give Robbie a solemn look. _You haven't shown her yours yet._

"No, I know, and I'll do that too," Robbie said.

Lyn frowned. "Dad… he didn't say anything."

"Doesn't need to, does he? Known him all these years, all it takes is a look sometimes." _I know, I know, but one thing at a time, okay?_

Lyn nodded in acceptance. "You and Mum were like that, too."

"I'm sorry, Lyn," James said, before Robbie could speak again. "You must feel that this is an awful way to repay you for your kind welcome–"

"No, James–" Robbie began, but Lyn cut across him.

"James, I'm not upset that you and Dad are a couple. Honestly, if you knew how much I've wanted him to find someone – I hate thinking of him being alone. I just wish he'd told me."

"He really didn't have a chance," James said, and this time he stepped out of Robbie's arms. "It's true, we've been getting closer for a long time, but as friends. He never knew how I really felt about him, until yesterday."

Robbie reached for James's hand and held it tightly. "Didn't know how I really felt about James meself. I know now, though. And I **was** gonna tell you. Didn't think it was right to do it before the party, though. All right?" he asked Lyn; as much as he'd told James that what Lyn thought didn't matter where his feelings for James were concerned, he wanted Lyn to be okay with this.

"Of course it is!" With a sob in her voice, Lyn rushed to the two of them and hugged them. 

"Thank you," James murmured. _I know you told me, but... I'm so glad, Robbie. I don't want to come between you._

Robbie squeezed his hand again, then pulled back to look at Lyn. "There's more to tell, but later, all right? Once Matthew's in bed, we'll all talk – Tim as well."

Lyn looked a bit troubled. "It's nothing… bad, is it?"

Robbie realised what she must be thinking. "Oh! No, pet, I promise, it's nothing you need to worry about. I would've told you long ago if there were something like that."

Lyn gave him a suspicious glance. "Would you?"

"No," Robbie admitted. "But I would've told you by now."

James snorted with laughter, and even Lyn smiled at that.

"All right," she said. Then she hesitated, resting a hand on James's arm. "James… I don't know what I said back there, but…"

"You didn't mean anything by it," James said quickly. "I know that."

"Sometimes that doesn't matter," Lyn said. "And I could see that… whatever I said… it hurt you. And I'm sorry it did."

Robbie noted with relief that Lyn didn't ask him to tell her what was wrong. James and Lyn were getting on well enough, but goodness knows asking James to open up about his past was like asking Tony Blair to go on _Strictly Come Dancing_. The prospects were, to say the least, poor.

"Thank you, Lyn," James said quietly. "Some day… not Matthew's birthday, but some other day… I'll explain."

Robbie tucked an arm round James. _I'm proud of you, lad._

"Did we miss the group hug?"

Tim had come out to join them, Matthew in his arms. Lyn went over to take Matthew from him. "Dad and James just told me they're together."

Tim grinned. "I could've told you that. Knew as soon as I looked at them last night."

James looked at Robbie, then back at Tim. "What gave us away?"

Tim raised an eyebrow. "You two call yourselves detectives? I hope you never go undercover. Robbie barely took his eyes off you all evening, once Lyn put Matthew down."

Robbie smiled sheepishly. "S'pose that's true."

"He was just making sure I was behaving myself," James quipped. _Mesmerised by my stunning good looks, were you?_

"Yeah, right." And that would do for both of his smartarse dragon–lad's remarks. Though James could have been as cheeky as he wanted just now, and it would've made no difference. To hear him joking like this after the discovery he'd been dreading... it's bloody brilliant.

"Well, that answers the question of what Matthew needs to call you once he gets the hang of names," Lyn said with a wicked grin.

James gave Lyn a politely inquisitive look. "What do you mean?" _I've only got one name._

Tim was now wearing a grin to match Lyn's. "What variation of 'Granddad' do you prefer?"

James's lips parted in surprise. _Robbie. Is he taking the mickey?_

_I don't think so, lad_. "Bagsies on whichever you don't want," Robbie said, tone lightly joking.

"You're serious," James said quietly to Lyn and Tim.

Lyn nodded. "If you're that much of a part of Dad's life, James, you're part of all our lives. You're our family just as much as we're yours."

"Oh," James whispered, fumbling for Robbie's hand to hold. _Robbie. F–family._

Robbie found James's hand and held on tight. _Aye, and the proper kind of family, lad. The kind that loves you and cares for you no matter what._

James's breath hitched in his throat. "Thank you. That's…" He shook his head, clearly overwhelmed. "Thank you. To both of you. All of you, I should say."

"You're welcome." Lyn grinned again, and the way her eyes were dancing reminded Robbie so much of Val – and he knew there was more mischief coming. "Papa."

James's face was a picture. "Um... I hope you're joking."

"Not at all," Tim said with a completely straight face. "We do things properly in this family. You're Dad's partner, so you'll be Papa. Unless you'd prefer Step–Dad or Father, or–"

"Very funny," James said, shaking his head. _And I know **he's**_ joking, because I heard him call you Robbie last night.

"And, since you are a fully–fledged member of this family, **Papa** ," Lyn continued, "Matthew needs changing – and it's your turn."

James was properly taken aback by that request. "I don't mind," James stammered. "I mean, of course I… I don't mind helping to… that is, once I know how, but you see, I've never…" He gave Robbie a mute, pleading look that said _help me_ clearly as any true speech ever could.

"Come on," Robbie said, taking pity on the lad and gesturing for Lyn to bring Matthew to him. Which she did. "Let the old master show you how it's done." 

He carried Matthew into the nursery, James following close behind. Everything was already laid out for maximum ease, and Robbie patiently explained the steps of removing the dirty nappy, cleaning and powdering the baby, and then putting on a clean nappy.

"Babies do squirm a bit," Robbie said to James. "That's normal. So don't panic if he moves a bit while you're trying to change him. Just be patient and take your time and it will all come right."

James nodded, resting a hand on Robbie's shoulder. _I like this. Getting to see your paternal side_. His gaze drifted to the doorway. _Looks like I'm not the only one._

Lyn and Tim were standing in the doorway, watching them, and Lyn had a small smile on her face.

"What?" Robbie asked.

"I was just thinking. This is what you did for us," Lyn said. "It's like travelling back in time and seeing your dad taking care of you."

"Yeah," Robbie said quietly. Only James could hear him add, _You'll always be my little girl._

* * *

"Leave that," Robbie said later as Lyn resumed picking up party debris. "We can finish it later – or in the morning. Come an' sit down, pet. Time we talked."

Tim took Lyn's hand and steered her to the large sofa. Robbie nodded to the two–seater and James joined him there.

"The first thing I want you to understand, love," Robbie said, looking straight at Lyn while holding James's hand, "is that this – me bein' with a bloke – doesn't mean I didn't love your mum the way she deserved, or anything like that. I wasn't secretly–"

Lyn shook her head. "It's okay, Dad. I know. It's just James, isn't it?"

"Yeah." _Never even thought about a bloke like that till you just... grew on me_. Immediately, he heard James's silent laugh and realised what he'd said.

"But that's not – There is something else I want you to know. Hate you to find out accidentally." James squeezed Robbie's hand. With his free hand, Robbie pulled up the side of his jumper, revealing the shimmering silver scales.

Both Lyn and Tim gasped, and Lyn's eyes widened. "They're lovely," she whispered.

_Apparently the dragon bit of you is a supermodel_ , James quipped silently. Robbie pressed his lips together tightly to keep from laughing.

"I take it this is a recent development, Robbie?" Tim said curiously.

Robbie nodded. "Recent enough, aye."

"It's very rare, isn't it?" Lyn said. "An onset of scales at your age?" She smiled. "Now we know where Matthew got them, I suppose."

"No, not exactly," Robbie said. He didn't like to tell them the whole truth… but it would be doing James a disservice if he didn't. "I've never been part dragon till now."

Tim frowned. "I don't understand."

Robbie took a deep breath. "I was… badly hurt during the investigation of a case. James used one of his own scales to heal me… to save my life. And when the wound healed… these grew over it."

Lyn didn't need to be told much to understand how serious the incident had been. She saw the area the scales covered and could probably guess the extent of the wound from that. And of course she would've paid particular attention to the phrase "to save my life." She shivered, and Tim gave her hand a gentle squeeze.

"Thank you, James," Lyn whispered, tears brimming in her eyes. "I don't know what I would've done if I'd lost Dad."

James nodded. "You're welcome." _I don't know what I would've done if I'd lost him either._

Robbie squeezed James's hand gently. _But you didn't. I'm here thanks to you._

"So," Lyn began, clearly trying to change the subject away from the painful topic, "are you moving, Dad? Or will James move in with you?"

"Um." Robbie hesitated. _Never even thought about that_. "We haven't really had a chance to think about it yet."

"Right. But wouldn't it be difficult? I mean, James is still your sergeant, isn't he?"

He glanced at James, who was trying not to grin. "There might be some things to work out, yes." _But we'll figure something out. I want you with me. Loved sleeping with you in me arms last night._

"Mm," James agreed. "Sleeping with your boss isn't really considered appropriate behaviour." _I never want to sleep apart from you again._

"Well, you could just ask to be reassigned to different partners, couldn't you?" Tim suggested. James remained silent and motionless, yet Robbie felt his appalled flinch.

"Have to see what happens," Robbie said, non–committal.

Lyn grinned suddenly. "And then next year or the year after, whenever the government gets its act together, you could get married!"

Robbie expected James to say something sarky, but instead, James was silent. Robbie turned to look at him, trying to gauge his emotional state, and then he turned back to Lyn. "If we decide we need that."

"What do you mean?" Lyn asked, brow furrowed.

"We've been… bonded… a long while," Robbie said slowly, trying to work it out for himself in words. "Before the scales, before any of that. We haven't spoken about… formalising it, making it official."

"You mean because you've committed to each other already," Tim said.

Robbie looked at Tim; he was winning all the prizes for observation this visit. Robbie nodded. "Right." _Ever thought about getting married, James?_

_I never thought it was an option. I never thought anyone would want…_ James leaned against Robbie. _I'll have to think about it._

Lyn laughed softly. "You two do more talking without talking than anyone I've ever met.

"Oh." No–one other than Robbie would hear the faint note of alarm in James's voice. _Please, don't tell them. I... I don't want anyone–_

_Course not, pet_. "It's a copper thing. Have to learn to read each other on the job."

"You would say that, Dad. And there I was thinking it's so romantic, like you two really are meant for each other."

Robbie looked at James, who was smiling affectionately, and a little shyly, back at him. "That we are."

James's smile grew wider. "You even said it the very first time we met." He pulled Robbie's hand, still in his, over onto his lap. "And I've been courting you ever since."

_That what you call it? And all this time, I thought you were just being a smartarse_. He squeezes James's hand. "Suppose you have."

"Absolutely." _And that's **your** smartarse_. James drops his head to Robbie's shoulder.

"Always."


End file.
